Janessa Kepshawn felt off balance. Raddy had his arm around her throat as he dragged her away and had been cutting off her air. He had since dropped her on the floor. As she got her breath back she saw they were in the corridor just outside the common hall. She saw Raddy squatting just in front of her.
“This is not who I am,” he kept saying, “This is not who I am. This is not me. I don’t have to do this. This is not me.”
Janessa carefully tried to move away but Raddy noticed she was lucid. There were tears streaming down his face.
“This isn’t who I am,” he yelled at her, “This isn’t me. Why did I do that? I didn’t have to do that. I never took it before. I never had to take it. They gave it to me. And why did I do that to her? I did it wrong. I wanted to do it wrong. She knew about my mother. I had to shut her up. I can’t be like this. This can’t be who I am. Because if it is then it means she was right. I can’t let her be right. This is not me.”
Janessa backed up against the wall. Raddy seemed to calm down suddenly.
“Do you know how pretty you are?” he said, “Most of the girls who used to throw themselves at me, they were not as pretty as you. Yeah they were hot or just slutty, but none of them were as gorgeous as you.”
Raddy reached for Janessa and she flinched.
“Why would you do that?” he said, “I’m not going to hurt you. I wouldn’t do that. That’s not who I am. Don’t you get it? Look at this. I found it. It’s part of a gun. I think someone took it apart. I bet I could break someone’s skull open with it.”
Raddy was distracted for just a moment as he stroked the metal object he was holding. Janessa jumped to her feet and bolted for the common hall. There had to be someone there. Raddy went after her. He was fast. He managed to grab the waistband of her shorts. He tore them. Janessa let the scraps of cloth fall off and she kept running. The common hall was empty.
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